The Renegade's Redemption Page 18

  Ravena shook her head. “I can’t believe it’s practically done.”

  Pushing open the last door, he released her to let her move past him into what would be her bedroom. This room hadn’t been whitewashed before she’d fallen asleep.

  “It looks amazing...” Her compliment faded to silence when she caught sight of something sitting on the windowsill that hadn’t been there the night before. “What’s this?” she asked, crossing the room. Ravena picked up the object and realized it was the bird she’d seen Tex carving several weeks earlier.

  She ran her fingertip over the tiny carved feathers of the wings. “Tex, this is incredible.”

  “It’s a raven.” He walked over and stopped in front of her.

  Lifting her chin, she gazed up at him, her heart resuming its earlier rapidity. He knew the story of how her parents had come to name her “Ravena” because of her raven-black hair. But was there more behind his choosing this creature to carve? “Why a raven? Why not a different bird?”

  “Because a different bird doesn’t remind me of you.” The intensity in his blue eyes made it more and more difficult to draw a full breath.

  “I remind you of a bird?” she countered, half teasing. If she kept things light, as Tex usually did, then she wouldn’t have to acknowledge the emotion his closeness or his gift inspired. Emotion she wasn’t sure she wanted to examine—not when he was leaving for good tomorrow.

  His half smile seemed to suggest he knew what she was doing. “I’ve always thought of you whenever I see a raven.” His fingers brushed wisps of her hair from her cheek, warming it as surely as the blush she felt there. “They remind me of your black hair and eyes.” He softly ran his thumb over her right eyelid. “They remind me of your compassion and loyalty too. Like in the story with Elijah when the ravens bring him food and help save his life.”

  Tex cupped her face between his hands then, his fingers tangling in her hair. “How many times have you saved my life, Ravena—or given me something worth living for? First when we were kids and my father left. Then when my mother died. And again when I came back here, shot and bleeding.” He cleared his throat as his expression grew more somber, almost pleading. “Why do you keep saving me?” The last question hardly made a sound in the empty room.

  Tears filled her throat and pressed hard behind her eyes, but Ravena willed them back. “Because you are worth saving, Tex Beckett.”

  His gaze widened in surprise before dropping to her lips. Ravena held her breath. He was going to kiss her, for certain this time. Closing her eyes, she only had to wait a fraction of a second before Tex’s lips touched hers. The familiarity of his kiss filled her with the happiness of a thousand shared memories. And yet the newness of kissing him now, after all these years, sparked fresh delight and anticipation as if she were a girl of sixteen all over again.

  Resting her hand on his shirt, Ravena kissed him back. And in that moment, the heartaches of the past and the uncertainty of their future fell away, forgotten. What mattered was Tex was still here and she was here and kissing him again felt like the most natural, most wonderful thing in the world.

  He eased back after a minute or two, his eyes searching hers. “Ask me to stay longer, Ravena.”

  “What?” she asked with a startled laugh.

  “I don’t have to leave tomorrow. I can stay and help you, after you bring those boys back. I can even stay until harvest time.”

  Shaking her head, she tried to make sense of his words. “But you said you couldn’t stay. You had to go. You’ve already proven you’re not your father, Tex. You don’t have to prove anything else to anyone.”

  His thumbs caressed her face. “I wouldn’t stay to prove something.” He pressed his forehead to hers. “I’d stay because I want to.”

  She didn’t quite dare believe his declaration. “But...”

  “I’ll stay in the old house or in the room off the barn, if that will make it more proper and ward off any gossip.”

  Sharp hope beat in time with her heart, making her feel lightheaded. Did he really mean what he was saying? “What made you change your mind?” She needed to know, to have everything laid out.

  Tex lowered his hands to her shoulders. “You helped change my mind all these weeks I’ve been here. And something the pastor said on Sunday helped too.”

  “Ah. The infamous pastor.” She shot him a smile, thinking again how thrilling it had been when she’d realized Tex was a little jealous of the other man’s perceived attentions toward her.

  He kissed her quickly. “Yes, that pastor.” His demeanor grew serious again. “I’m done making choices out of fear. And I’m done running. I want to stay put.”

  Ravena wet her lips, feeling her own fears creeping in. Could she fully trust him to keep his word this time? And if she could, did she want to remain just friends?

  She knew the answer at once. Given more time, she knew she’d want more from their relationship than friendship. But Tex had to want that too. His kisses today were evidence that he might wish for something deeper, and more permanent, between them, but he might change his mind again in another few months.

  “What happens with us?” She hated the feeling of vulnerability that came with asking such a question, and yet, she wanted no more surprises. She’d lived with his abrupt disappearance from her life once before; she wouldn’t willingly go through that a second time.

  Tex regarded her without a trace of amusement or teasing. “I want to be in your life, Ravena. Now and always. If all you’re willing to offer is friendship right now, then I’ll take that and wait. But you need to know, I’m holding out for more than that.” His earnestness was palpable. “I foolishly chose to let you go once. I don’t want to do that again.”

  “You promise?” She could hardly believe he’d voiced the words she’d hoped for so long to hear from him.

  “I promise.” His firm answer echoed in the room.

  She peered deeply into his blue eyes, wanting so badly to trust him again. The sounds of the children playing outside floated up and through the window opening. It was time for them to go to school and for her and Jacob to head to Boise. “All right,” she said with a nod. “I accept your offer to stay.”

  It was Tex’s turn to look taken aback. “You do?”

  Letting her smile break through, she nodded. “Yes, Tex. I trust you to keep your word this time.” She glanced down at the smooth floorboards, feeling suddenly shy. “And if you’re willing to wait and stay in the old house once we move into this one, I’d like to see if we could be more than friends too.”

  He clasped her to him and swung her around, making her laugh. She hadn’t felt this lighthearted in ages. “You’d better go,” he said when he set her back on her feet. “So you can reach Boise by this evening.”

  “Will you be all right here?” she asked. He’d already agreed to watch over the other four children and the farm during her two-day absence.

  Tex grasped her hand and brought it to his lips. “We’ll be fine. Ginny can help me with the cooking, and the boys can help with the chores.”

  “And Fanny?” she prompted with a smile.

  “Fanny can tag along and entertain us with the kittens.”

  When they reached the stairs, she stopped him, his lovely bird carving still clutched inside her hand. “Thank you, Tex. For finishing the house and for being here so I can go get the others.”

  His eyes softened right before he pressed another lingering kiss to her lips. “I’m glad it all worked out.”

  And so was she. As she trailed him down the stairs, she couldn’t help offering a quick prayer that things would continue to work out—for the orphans, for the farm and, most of all, for her and Tex.

  * * *

  After seeing Ravena and Jacob off, Tex completed the morning chores, checked on the fields and saddled B
rutus to ride into town. He wanted to have as much of the remaining projects on the new house completed as he could before Ravena returned the following evening. Not having a wagon posed a problem, but he would try to find someone willing to cart the window glass back to the farm. He was no longer afraid of someone recognizing him, not after the warm welcome he’d received while attending church.

  The bright sunlight, shining down on him as he rode, suited his jovial mood. Today the surrounding hills, farms and fields struck him as beautiful in their familiarity. It was time to hang up his hat, so to speak. Because there was no other place on earth he wanted to be right now than here, with Ravena.

  Recalling their kisses earlier, he smiled foolishly at himself. He had to admit he’d wanted to kiss her ever since his first night at the farm when he’d woken up and found her compassionately rebandaging his wound.

  And now he was here to stay. Hopefully he could convince her that he’d already fallen in love with her a second time. But for now he’d accept her friendship and the adoration that frequently filled her dark eyes when she gazed at him, until Ravena was ready...to be his wife. He grinned, his chest expanding with the possibility. That’s what he wanted, more than anything. To marry her, to be a father to these children, and to stay put.

  You can’t change that before coming here you were an outlaw. Tex frowned at the intrusive thought. Eventually he’d need to tell Ravena the truth about his past, but he could wait. He’d first let her see that he meant what he’d said about staying indefinitely. His outlawing days were over. No more heists, no more running, no more loneliness.

  But his mind refused to let go of the familiar rut of self-denigration. Why did he think he deserved Ravena? You’re still a worthless no-account, who up and left everyone. The voice in his head sounded exactly like his father’s, the words echoing ones Tex himself had often said about the man.

  Except he wasn’t a worthless no-account. Wasn’t he worth saving, as Ravena had declared, worth loving?

  And if he was, then the same was true for his father.

  The simple but powerful realization struck Tex so hard he stopped Brutus in the middle of the road. Thinking the worst about his father had only made it easier for him to think the worst about himself. They’d both made mistakes—big, painful mistakes. But he wanted to believe those mistakes didn’t make them worth less. And chances were, that’s what his father had wanted to believe about himself too.

  “I’m sorry, Pa,” he whispered to the cloudless blue sky. He didn’t know if his father was dead or alive, but somehow voicing the words aloud eased the resentment he’d been holding on to for twenty years. “And most important, for me, I forgive you.”

  He nudged his horse forward again, but he couldn’t maintain their earlier languid pace. Kneeing Brutus into a gallop, Tex let out a shout of joy. He felt less burdened than he ever had in his life. And he couldn’t wait to tell Ravena about it, after he surprised her with a completely finished house. His life had taken a new direction, had a new purpose now, and he couldn’t wait to see how it all unfolded.

  Chapter Thirteen

  The horses made good time to Boise, which meant it was midafternoon when Ravena and Jacob arrived. Though this wasn’t her first trip to the city, Ravena still marveled at the bustle of people and the tall buildings. She considered stopping at a hotel first before going to the orphanage, but she wanted Miss Morley to know they’d arrived.

  She drove to the orphanage and parked the wagon out front. “I’ll be right back,” Ravena told Jacob. “I just want her to know we made it.”

  Hurrying up the walk, she didn’t try to quell the excitement bursting through her. They’d done it—they’d completed enough of the house to bring these boys to the farm, just as her grandfather had wished. She knocked on the door. Small faces pressed up against the windows on either side and made her smile.

  The door opened to reveal a young woman near Ravena’s own age. “May I help you?”

  “Yes, I’m here to see Miss Morley.” Best to start there before she went in search of the brothers. Ravena looked past her to see a number of children watching them. Were any of these the boys she’d come to claim?

  The other girl offered an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, but Miss Morley isn’t here. She’s at the train station.”

  It took a moment for her words to register. “The train station? Why is she there?”

  “The Orphan Train arrived today.”

  Ravena fell back a step, panic squelching her anticipation. “But it wasn’t supposed to come until tomorrow.”

  “Miss Morley wasn’t expecting it either. She only just got the orphans readied who are leaving. Shall I tell her you stopped by, Miss...”

  Spinning on her heel, Ravena hurried back down the walk. “I’ll find her there,” she called back.

  “What happened?” Jacob asked as she scrambled onto the wagon seat. “You look awfully white, Miss Ravena.”

  She slapped the reins and guided the horses up the street. “We may be too late. The Orphan Train arrived a day early.”

  “That’s not good.”

  “No, it’s not good at all.”

  The train depot seemed to teem with people, causing further alarm inside Ravena. Would she find Miss Morley and the boys before the train departed? Handing the reins to Jacob, she hopped to the ground. “Park the wagon, then come find me. I’ll see if I can spot them.”

  She didn’t wait for Jacob’s reply. Instead she began pressing her way through the crowd. She had a vague memory of what Miss Morley looked like—tall, gray bun, kind green eyes.

  Ravena frantically searched the faces of those around her. “Miss Morley?” she finally called out in desperation. “Miss Morley?”

  Up ahead a woman turned and lifted a gloved hand. Relief flooded through Ravena and she rushed forward.

  “Miss Reid,” the woman said in an equally pleased tone. “I’m so glad you made it. The train came early and we weren’t prepared. I would have sent a telegram, but I wasn’t sure one would reach you in time.”

  Ravena clutched the woman’s arm. “It’s all right. I’m here now.” She paused to let her racing heart slow to normal rhythm. “Have they boarded the train yet?”

  “No,” Miss Morley said with a smile. She stepped back, revealing four solemn-looking boys, each with light brown hair. “Miss Reid, may I introduce Edmund, Felix, Winston and Ralph Wight.”

  “I’m Ralphey,” the youngest boy declared with a scowl.

  From their correspondence, Ravena already knew their ages—13, 10, 7 and 5. “Hello, boys. I’m so happy to meet you.” She crouched down beside Ralphey. “How would you boys like to come live with me and five other orphans on my farm?”

  The eldest glanced at Miss Morley. “Would that mean we wouldn’t have to go on the Orphan Train? That we can stay all together?”

  “That’s right, Edmund.” The woman placed her hand on the boy’s shoulder. “I wanted to tell you of this alternate plan sooner, but I felt I should wait until Miss Reid’s arrival before getting your hopes up.”

  Ravena stood, already loving the little ragtag group. “So what do you say? Would you all like to come live with me?”

  Edmund eyed his three brothers, and something unspoken passed between the four of them. “Yes, Miss Reid.” He turned to face her, his young face finally breaking into a smile. “We’d like that.”

  Ravena blew out the breath she’d been holding. “Excellent. Now, let’s see about your luggage.”

  “It’s over there, near that bench.” Miss Morley waved toward one wall of the train station. “One of our older orphans has been minding everyone’s suitcases.”

  With Miss Morley leading the way through the crowd, Ravena fell into line behind Felix. Jacob appeared at her elbow a moment later. “Did you find them?” he asked, his face hop
eful.

  “Yes.” She put her arm around him, feeling giddy. “They’re collecting their things now. Come meet them.” He followed behind her as she made her way to the designated bench.

  Ravena introduced Jacob to the boys. Then as the four brothers set about extracting their suitcases and saying their farewells, she let her gaze wander to the different advertisements and Wanted posters hung on the nearby wall. She casually perused them, until a familiar face met her eyes.

  It was Tex, staring back at her from one of the posters.

  Certain she was imagining things, she took a step closer. Why would Tex’s face be on a Wanted poster? Ravena read the boldface type, and with each word, shock squeezed harder and harder at her lungs and her stomach rolled with nausea.

  Wanted: Dead or Alive. The Dangerous Outlaw Known as The Texas Titan. A rather large cash reward was listed, along with a description of the man’s crimes—train and bank robberies—and his physical appearance. Not only was it Tex’s face, but the mention of blue eyes, brown hair and height measurements fit too.

  Ravena lifted her hand to her mouth, certain she was going to be sick. Maybe it was a mistake. Maybe someone else happened to look like Tex. It could even be Tate, she told herself. But she dismissed the thought at once. Tate becoming an outlaw was as likely as chickens learning to fly. Tex, on the other hand—charismatic, adventure-seeking Tex—well, it wasn’t out of the realm of possibilities.

  “Are you familiar with the Texas Titan, ma’am?”

  Lowering her hand, she glanced up to find a heavy-set man with a gray beard standing close and watching her shrewdly.

  “I...um...” She couldn’t seem to speak past the disbelief clogging her throat. Did she know this outlaw? Had she been harboring a Wanted fugitive on her farm? Her head felt heavy and her skin clammy, despite the heat of the summer sun. She feared she might faint.

  If the older gentleman noticed, he didn’t comment on her visible uneasiness. Instead he went on talking. “He’s a wily one. Wanted for train and bank robberies all throughout Texas.”